I was at the currency exchange today waiting in line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for sterling. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat poun of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady relied, "Fluc you white people too!"

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Did you know that white people own more dogs than black people. That's because it's illegal to own black people now.

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St. Peter's standing at the Pearly Gates, and he spies a little brown face coming up the escalator. A little Pakistani wanders up to him and says 'Good Morning please, be wanting to come into heaven thankyou' 'Look mate', says St. Peter 'It doesn't work that way, you're a muslim, aren't you' 'Yes, being a good muslim thankyou' 'No mate, look I'm sorry. You just can't come in, you're off down there' 'I am GOOD muslim. Wanting to be coming in please' 'You can't be a good muslim, how?' 'But AM GOOD muslim. I am even giving things to charity all the time' St. Peter sighs. 'Like what?' The Pakistani stands up proudly. 'Only last week, I am giving twenty pounds to the children in need' St. Peter considers this for a second and finally resigns himself to the fact that this chap deserves a bit of his time. 'Right, fine, okay" he sighs, "You win. I'll go and have a word with God, wait here' So off he trots wearily through the Pearly Gates, and returns a couple of hours later. He walks back up to the Pakistani and says 'Right, I've had a chat with God about you and it's all sorted.' 'Here's your twenty quid back, now Fuck Off'.

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People are like sharks. The great ones are white

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